Masters of Mediocrity (Jan-May 2015)

                               

It's true that 2015 hasn't been as shitty a year for K-pop as 2014 had been, thank heavens for that, but I'd be lying if I said there hasn't been some really terrible music, too. Well, I'm not gonna talk about the shitty or the good songs today, but about those that stand annoyingly in the middle; just plain old, "meh".

It's time to throw some spotlight at those songs that aren't memorable in any way, neither for how catchy they are nor for how cringe-worthy they are; the songs that are so unremarkable on so many different levels; the songs that have no value at all, and have no influence whatsoever or a reason for existing.

So let's take a moment to thank them for not giving us a mental breakdown, but also shit on them because of how unremarkably boring they are.

These are the Masters of Mediocrity.

10. 9MUSES - 'Drama'

Now I always liked 9MUSES' music (Namyu stan here), but this song was just dull and boring as hell. I couldn't care less about Eunji and Lee Sem leaving, but it was Sera's departure that really affected them, since she was one of the better vocalists and she had a unique voice. To me, Namyu lost their 'sound' and this is clearly evident here. I would have put them a little higher up the list but since no one was expecting much from them anyway after those, "developments", they've landed themselves the tenth spot with Drama. However, though the music video was bland as fuck, the visuals and outfits were on point (excluding Sungah, anyway).



9. Big Bang - 'Bae Bae'

The song was alright, but not Big Bang standard. To be honest, I was pretty disappointed with their double comeback, both the songs were pretty bland (Loser ranks higher up this list since 'Bae Bae' was slightly better). The video, though, is another story. But we're not here to talk about that.

8. SNSD - 'Catch Me If You Can'

The song isn't terrible, but it's not great either. Huge improvement since I Got A Bitch, but that doesn't stop it from making the list. Good for you, GG! This comeback also proves that Jessica getting the boot doesn't really affect the group since she never contributed much anyway. Simultaneously she is also now free to follow her dreams of becoming a pornstar, so win-win right?

7. CLC - 'Like'

The song was alright but doesn't live up to 'Pepe'. 'Pepe' had a really catchy chorus and it's a song that instantly grabs you on first listen. As for this one... I don't even remember how it goes. Apart from that, the music video was everything a K-pop stereotype is- overwhelmingly bright colours, overly cutesy girls, some shit about oppa and ermagawwwd revenge. Skip. Also, really terrible outfits.

6. Jay Park - 'Sex Trip'

Not sure if it's appropriate to put this one here since it's not really K-pop, but ah fuck it. I couldn't not include it.

5. Red Velvet - 'Automatic'

Why does this exist again?

4. Big Bang - 'Loser'

So this is the Big Bang comeback everyone was waiting for. Seriously now? You made everyone wait two years for this shit? Heck I could compose a better song. But why does it matter? Why bother making good music anyway? They already have a huge fandom consisting of dumb, delusional fanboys and fangirls who will buy whatever is thrown at them. Even if it's middle-class garbage like this.

3. Jun Hyoseong - 'Into You'

Hyoseong easily made this list at the very first listen. But this shit sells anyway, for obvious reasons.

Bet you wanna squeeze those tits.

2. Miss A - 'Only You'

Miss A has never failed to disappoint me with their consistency in making good music. Until now, of course. I've stanned them ever since I could remember but this song is so mediocre, it's sad. It has a nice instrumental but the rest is just dull as fuck, there is literally nothing to talk about here except for how much I'm disappointed with this comeback. However, it's just like the old saying, "a little Fei saves the day."

I just farted all over your bias list.

1. KARA - 'Cupid'

I literally could never get halfway through this music video, heaven knows I tried. There is nothing remotely interesting about it to be honest. I liked 'Mamma Mia' to some extent, even though the chorus gets annoying after a while, but this is just... ugh. All I can say is, congrats, KARA, you made the top of the list. Fucking A!

Well that was my opinion anyway. I may have forgotten some songs, or I may have terrible taste in music. Anyways, leave your opinions in the comments; what songs did you find most mediocre this year so far that may have not been included in this list?

Extra:

G-dragon looking fa-fa-fabulous at the airport. 

GD, teach me your pretty ways~